And he dresses like Johnny Cash

So a millionaire won the Powerball jackpot. I'm sure that fact pisses a lot of people off, but not being a big lottery fan myself, I say "bwa ha ha!!!" "'I just want to thank God for letting me pick the right numbers — or letting the machine pick the right numbers,' said Whittaker"Well put, Jack, and congratulations. The American dream lives on.

I'm all out of creativity for this one

I talked to my best friend from high school this evening. He's in town for a couple weeks, and his Southern Baptist girlfriend is with him. I actually get to meet her this trip, which should be a trip in itself. This is a girl who changed churches out of shame when she was seen at Wal-Mart in blue jeans. My friend once got the silent treatment for hours for using "the H word". I'm sure we'll have a lot to talk about, especially since Fred Phelps was recently in their town. Another one of my friends e-mailed me today asking for help in finding man. So here it is: My (female) friend needs a man. If you're short, ugly or if your idea of first date chit-chat is "I think I'm gonna barf", you are not the one. She's 22 (I think), good lookin', an excellent dancer, quite horny, and she's probably reading this. :) I'll post a picture as soon as I can. This is what happens when you leave town over New Year's!!! Besides, I only have like 4 days to find my own man. I like helping people.

Have we lost sight of the true meaning of Boxing Day?

My mailbox key isn't working. It hasn't worked all week. This happens from time to time, but it's usually self-correcting and has never gone on this long. The real pisser is that my roommate is gone til the 6th, so I can't use his "magic key of consistent openage". Grrr....Work was boring and I was bitchy. I've perfected the art of being bitchy and insulting in a professional and helpful manner. I'm thinking I'll write a book on the subject.I'm starting to wonder why it is that there seem to be a lot of people who love Creed and a lot of people who voted Republican, and yet I know none and few of them, respectively. I smell a conspiracy.

"So this ...

"So this is your last Christmas."-My aunt, to my ailing Catholic grandmother, in reference to her moving into a Jewish assisted living facility. Or so she claimed.Christmas with the liberal side of the family. The wine flowed freely, as did the menopausal bitchiness. I got a bottle of shiraz from my aunt, which has to be one of the best gifts ever. I also inherited the leftover beer, a few dozen Harper's and New Yorkers...and last week's sunday comics. I feel like I should say something profound, but hell, there are magazines to be cut up.